Today has been a nice day. I was able to enjoy memories of Rachael with my mom here with me. I am so grateful that Rachael was in my life. It is rare that a day goes by without me thinking about her. She has affected me in so many ways. Her death has strengthened my testimony and taught me how to love. I love to think that she was taking care of Alex before he joined us.
On 23 February 1995 she wrote in her journal, "For one of my goals I am watching to see that people love me. I know my Dad loves me because he goes to work every day so I can have food on my plate. I know my Mom loves me because she is so supporting, loving, kind, and patient with me. I know Michelle loves me because she puts up with me. I know Matthew loves me because he will include me in his games even though I exclude him. I know Emily loves me because every night she gives me a love and tells me so. I know Nathanael loves me because he likes me to hang out with him. I know Jared loves me because he asks me to do things for him and with him and I love him too."
David and Adam were not born yet when she wrote that but she later wrote about them.
3 April 1997 - "We went and got our pictures taken today... David was being so cute when you would say "Smile" he would shut his eyes hard and grin. I could hardly stop laughing."
21 March 1999 - "It was so windy that day. I was struggling to stay on the path. It was funny to watch Adam try." (This isn't a super lovey-dovey excerpt but it made me laugh.)
Four years later and I still miss her.
Families can be together forever.
I still think & talk about Rachael all the time. She was full of love... Wow, it's been 4 years. It is still really hard for me... And sometimes I just have to have a crying session then realize she probably watching me & I know she wants me to just smile. I have so many great memories of her. I use to love dancing to spice girls infront of the full length closet mirror... And then the hours on hours Rachael Sommar & I would be coming up with random thinks to do, usually always landing us in some trouble.
ReplyDeleteI will always remember her, she is still so close to my heart.
I love and miss you so much...
Rachel
Thank you for sharing these little excerpts from her journal! I would love to just have a day to go through pictures and journals and talk about her and remember all the good times. I sure miss her, too!
ReplyDeleteVery sweet Emily, how fun to have such a great sister to look up to. :)
ReplyDeletethank you for sharing, it reminds me to keep loving life and the people we have in it.
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