Pregnancy Reflection

Today is my due date. I do not feel like it is my due date though. It has been an odd pregnancy. The whole thing has seemed very laid back to me. Sometimes I remember that I was pregnant at Christmas though; that helps me realize it is almost time for a birth. But right now, it is time to look back over the past several months for my traditional pregnancy reflection.

I took my gestational diabetes test in a non-traditional way. I had to eat 63 jelly beans in five minutes. An hour later, the nurses tried to prick my finger to test my blood sugar but were unable to get the glucometer to work. So eating the jelly beans was useless. The doctor told me at 38 weeks that she is positive I do not have gestational diabetes though. So go me!

I had three baby showers/sprinkles. Totally spoiled beyond all reason. The first one was with a few friends from a Facebook moms group. It was a joint shower with another girl named Emily.

The next shower was put on by two friends from my ward. It was the classic baby shower with games.

The final shower was with friends from my MOMS Club. They are the most amazing women and I consider myself incredibly lucky to have them in my life.

I am basically drowning in baby girl clothes and diapers from all of these showers. It has been insane. If I had to pick a favorite gift though, it would be the one below. Alyssa Althoff and I met in Williston. She is freakishly talented and made this blanket, sheep, hat, and headbands. And I love the outfits she picked out. Basically she is really generous, she has really good taste, and she pairs it with her talent and ability to actually complete things she starts. I am the grateful beneficiary.

My doctor checked my cervix at 37 weeks. I was dilated to 1cm and the baby was at -3 station. She said I probably had a week left and I had a good laugh about that one. My doctor is clueless. I also had an ultrasound that day and Miss Merkley was weighing 6 lbs, 5 ounces.

Declan loves coming to my appointments. He always wants me to give him a check-up while we are waiting for the doctor to come in.

We finished her room a few days ago. We have never decorated a nursery before because we were moving around so often. I am so proud of this room. I made those paper dahlias and likely lost my fingerprints thanks to the hot glue. Dahlias are a late-summer flower and I thought it would be perfect for this little girl. That mobile in the corner took me five hours to make. The fabric garland also took a couple of hours to make, in addition to the couple of hours it took me to pick out fabrics. The curtains were meant for another room and ended up fitting here perfectly. The pink paper inside the dresser was carefully cut, matched, and inserted into the frame of the drawers. The picture frame on the dresser was made with pieces of colored glass and was my first experience grouting anything. The chair was selected after Goldilocks-ing every chair in multiple stores to find one that was just right. Small details that no one cares about, but I am happy with it. The name is above the garland and it is covered up for now. The reveal will happen after she arrives.

Workout Routine:
I have never been so consistent with working out. The only reason I have continued despite often feeling physically drained is because it was my job. At 28 weeks I started seriously decreasing my classes at the gym. I was down to only four classes a week. I taught my final class at 38 weeks + 5 days. It had just started getting uncomfortable. It was always hard but it didn't hurt until the end so I was glad that I had set an end date. I have missed my classes during the last week but I think it has been good for me.

Something awesome this pregnancy has been the Bella Band. I bought one while pregnant with Alex and I hated it because I felt like it was obvious my pants were unbuttoned. But workout pants don't have buttons poking out. The band filled the gap between my shirts and pants so I didn't have to buy maternity workout clothes!

Most surprising symptom:
I am so hot. I hate sleeping with the fan on but I have it on full blast every time I sleep. I can usually handle the heat as long as I keep moving. At 35 weeks I was shopping and, after checking out, I had to sit on the floor with my head between my legs because I was so dizzy and my vision was narrowing. It was freaky and probably due to being chronically dehydrated. After I semi-recovered, I went out to the car to turn on the air conditioning. That's when I took the picture below (in the blue shirt). I was so pale.

Favorite part:
Definitely feeling the baby move. It has been so fun and never gets old. She is very active. I am interested to meet her because it feels like she is made of pointy sticks and jagged rocks.

Most terrifying part:
Probably the most worried I ever was during this pregnancy was when I took a hard fall during the tug-of-war on the Trek. I fell in a Hurkie position and the amount of pelvic floor pain I was feeling was not nice. Why was I participating in the tug-of-war at 29 weeks pregnant? Good question with no good answer.

Most frequent craving:
Nothing good, that's for sure. I may have worked out a lot but I also ate a lot. The most frequent craving was probably vanilla ice cream with fresh fruit, especially raspberries or peaches.

Most annoying symptom:
I have two since pregnancy is oh-so much fun.
1) Not fitting my clothes and feeling gross about myself in general. I am not a very cute pregnant lady. I go from not looking pregnant to sickeningly giant with no middle ground.
2) I was obsessed with the song Stressed Out at the beginning of my pregnancy. I loved it and listened to it on repeat. I had dance parties to it with the boys. However, if that song comes on the radio now, I feel nauseous. It has been associated with the morning sickness of those first few weeks! So sad because I really liked that song!

Weirdest symptom:
I am going to count this as a symptom since it is caused by the growing belly: People will not stop touching my stomach. I have had my belly touched by strangers and acquaintances more during this pregnancy than the other three combined. It must be because I am around so many people from different cultures. I have gotten used to it and it does not bother me. However, someone asked me if she could put her hand on my baby's head and I said, "No, she is already head down." And then they just stared at me like, "So, let's feel it." And I said, "Her head is in my pelvis. No touchy."

Funniest memory:
I have lost my memory so I will go with this one... Alex giggled a few weeks ago and then said, "Your belly is getting so big that it makes you look shorter." Hilarious, kid.

Oh, I thought of another one. One day, I was leaving the gym and heading straight to mutual. I had not eaten dinner and was starving. I decided I needed pizza and I needed it now! I ended up stopping at a gas station but there was no pizza in sight and I bought a hot dog. I felt like such a crazy pregnant lady buying a gas station hot dog and nothing else. But I devoured it. And it was good.

Weight gain:
Starting weight - 128 pounds
First trimester - +3 pounds
Current weight - 162 pounds

When I was overdue with Edison, I wanted everyone to stop talking to me and just bring me cookies. So I made myself cookies a few days ago and have been enjoying them. I made a ton so they should last in the freezer for a long time!

Here I am on my due date. My body is kind of an overachiever when it comes to carrying babies. I have had zero labor signs and I am not holding my breath for them. I had an amazing day today. My mental health is strong. I am not trying everything I can think of to get her out. I am still hoping for a September 1st baby. Hopefully not August 30th and definitely not August 31st though (totally jinxing myself here). But it doesn't really matter when she is born. I can turn any day into party, even if it means she would never have a half birthday.



I was going to let this day come and go but the day is almost done and I just cannot let it pass without recording a few thoughts. I don't have a lot to say but I wanted to mark the occasion anyway; today's date means it has been 11 years since Rachael died. I love her still and miss her still. The perspective her death (and my subsequent reflection on her life) gave me is what I will focus on today.

It is easy to love those who love you, are kind to you, or like you. It is a true show of character if you are able to be kind to those who criticize, use, or ignore you. I will be a work in progress on this for the rest of my life.

I usually use this space to recap our lives. I rarely get serious, controversial, or religious. But most of my life is made up of church things so I will use this time to record my testimony. I do have a testimony. I rarely share it outside of our little Family Home Evenings as my words feel inadequate to express my feelings.

I know Jesus Christ lived on earth. He died for us, and He lives again. He taught by example and showed us how we should live. If we follow Him, we will be led back to our Heavenly Father. I know Joseph Smith was a prophet who translated the Gold Plates into the Book of Mormon so we can learn from its pages and become better people. I know I have been blessed by attending the temple. I am grateful for the ordinances performed there that remind me of my covenants. I know that I can be with my family forever if I keep those covenants. Christ is waiting for us. We cannot only look to Him, we must go to Him. My knowledge is imperfect but this is not blind obedience. The Holy Ghost helps me to be bravely obedient as I follow the promptings I receive. I know that no matter what choices we make in life, "[H]is anger is not turned away, but his hand is stretched out still." We are never beyond His reach, His love, His knowledge, and His peace.


Happy 7th Birthday, Alex!

Alex, oh Alex. He keeps getting older! Alex is a perfectionist. Normally that is not a problem because he can do things really well, but sometimes he cannot pick up on something the first try and it is really difficult to get him to keep trying. How do you motivate someone to be intrinsically motivated?! Alex is such a sweetheart though. I love having conversations with him. He has started telling jokes and I cannot believe how intricately his brain formulates thoughts. He is brilliant, but then reminds me that he is still a kid when he calls an apostrophe "a prepostrophe." He is quirky and likes weird things, e.g. his favorite color is black. But this crazy kid makes me so proud to be his mom. He is going to change the world.

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